Scripture: Ezekiel 37:1-14
Music and Lyrics: Gungor (one of my favorite artists). Gungor takes you to the acoustic video. Click Gungor -Dry Bones to listen to the mp3.
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Trust vs. Understanding
I have issues with trust. I’ve blogged about it before. Trusting people, trusting myself, trusting God.
I also am compulsive about trying to understand. Not so much how a DVR machine works or how to utilize most of the features on my Nikon camera instead of the two I use. Rather I am compulsive about understanding people and matters of the heart. If a relationship fails and I can’t understand why, it consumes me. If someone inflicts pain on another without remorse, their action inflicts confusion in me. When famine and other disasters strike, they destroy peace of mind.
Many days I don’t understand God. And that bothers me. Often. I want to understand God. I want to get inside His head and understand Her reasoning. I want to have a rational explanation for the things that don’t make sense to me and to so many others. And these things are numerous.
It is easy to mistake the quest for understanding as something God delights in. I think we teach that belief – sometimes overtly, sometimes subconsciously. Over and over we push ourselves and others to “pursue” God, to come to “know” God and inadvertently, we’ve crossed the line into understanding God = depth of relationship with God.
But that isn’t the case. My devotion reminded me of that this morning. It is from an outstanding devotion book entitled “Jesus Calling: Enjoying Peace in His Presence” by Sarah Young. Let me share this excerpt with you:
Understanding will never bring you Peace. That’s why I [God] have instructed you to trust in Me, not in your understanding. Human beings have a voracious appetite for trying to figure things outs, in order to gain a sense of mastery over their lives. (CONTROL FREAKS – my paraphrase)…. My Peace is not an elusive goal, hidden at the center of some complicated maze. Actually, you are always enveloped in Peace, which is inherent in My Presence. As you look to Me, you gain awareness of this precious Peace.
We crave Peace. I hunger for peace. I often succumb to the temptation that peace comes through understanding. Which is why I’m usually hungry for peace because understanding rarely provides it. Maybe temporary peace but never lasting peace. Peace comes through trust. Trusting in God and residing in His Presence. Doesn’t that even sound more peaceful? Rather than feeling burdened about trying to figure something out we, instead, simply need to reside in God’s Presence and let God envelop us in Peace. Like a God Snuggy.
Today, a Twitter friend posted this fill-in-the-blank question: “Today I will ________________ instead of ___________________.” He started it off by saying, “Today I will choose gratefulness instead of complaining.” I need that one today. I responded, “Today I will trust God instead of trying to understand God.”.
Question: Do you struggle to trust God? Are you a compulsive understand-er like me? How would you answer the question, “Today I will _______________ instead of _____________.” As aways I’d love to hear your thoughts by scrolling down to the comment section or by clicking this: comment section.
Hunger
The doctor’s office was simple and bleak. The walls were empty except for the chipping beige paint on stone walls connected to a stone floor. There were two worn cots with a simple white sheet on each one and a small wooden desk with a chair on either side.
This was the room where a young Somali mother brought her dying, infant son and the room where I came face to face with a malnourished baby.
This wasn’t an infomercial and there were no famous actors and film crews pleading to me through the television. Less than a foot away from me was a baby boy – barely breathing with sunken cheeks and a bloated stomach. His arms and legs were like toothpicks and he laid in his mother’s arms lifeless. Except for a faint irregular breathe that sucked my own breathe out of me.
The mother was young and guarded. The volunteer doctors that I was there with tried to get information from her but her answers were vague. Who knows why … Muslim girl in an Islamic neighborhood in a Christian clinic; young and scared; threatened by someone…. We didn’t know. We just needed answers if this baby had any chance of living. And even with an answer it didn’t seem likely that this young boy had a chance at a future.
The baby hadn’t eaten in weeks. Why? We don’t know. But the baby was starving to death. I literally thought he would die in her lap and several times we all paused waiting for another breathe to escape from his tiny mouth. I’ve never felt so helpless. The doctors felt the same way. They didn’t have the resources at the clinic to help the boy and there was no reason to believe the woman would do what was needed now if she wasn’t willing or able to do so before. The nearest hospital would not see her because she had no money and Somalians are hated by most Kenyans. The doctors debated what to do knowing the baby had only minutes. They reached into their own pockets and gathered enough money to send the mother and baby to a nearby mission hospital. They went out and secured the ride themselves to make sure she went. They weren’t hopeful that the baby would even make it to the hospital. But they had to try. They had to do something. Continue Reading…
Just Keep Swimming
It is unreal that it has been almost two months since I posted last. Where does time go? As April and May hit, my calendar and to-do lists churned out of control like one of the many tornadoes that spawned destruction across our country.
I’m in the final prep for a summer of travel once again. I’ll be home three weeks for the next two months so there is a lot to do before I head out. Prep for the trips I’m taking, prep for the programs that continue on back home, prep for the fall that will be here waiting when I return. If I stop and think about it, I can get physically ill over the stress. But like most things in life, we take it one day at a time and just keep swimming. There are seasons in our life where we have no choice but to do this. For some, it is a short season. For others, like my parents, it is a long season – years of care for aging parents and all that this entails. Those are the times you can’t do much other than take it one stroke at a time and plow through the water.
There are a lot of times when I get tired, stop swimming and look around. And I don’t see a shoreline. Just endless water as far as the eye can see. When I’m on a beach reading and sunning, I love that view. When I’m treading water, I want to give up. Just sink to the bottom or practice my dead man’s float. Or magically grow into a mermaid or pray for Tom Hanks and Wilson to come by on their make-shift raft and haul me in. Continue Reading…
My Life in Pictures
